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Writer's pictureCharity Malabad

The Pieces We Leave Behind

Updated: Sep 19, 2022

I take one last walk with the dogs through the neighborhood, soaking in as much detail of the beautiful place that I must leave. I walk through each room sitting just a moment to thank it for providing a place of refuge. This comes after fighting with it for the first year trying to get the clutter under control. Now I walk into each room and feel at peace, and it doesn't feel like I got to hold that peace quite long enough.


This blog is dedicated to all the military spouses out there. It is PCS season again, and for those not in the military life, that means we move duty stations. At first the excitement of a new assignment washes over you. A new place to explore, the possibility of a new friendships, and new adventures. Then two months into the throws of moving the excitement has worn off and you are just like, when will the madness end.


With each move I evaluate the memories of the places we have lived, I think back to the roots that I have placed. We have had so many adventures, met the most wonderful people, experienced a new culture, and so much more. It is a fine balance as a military spouse, you want deep enough roots to connect to the community around you, but not so deep that you can't pull those roots when that fated time comes you must start all over. When you think of pulling a plant, you know that some of those fine roots remain in the ground. That is how I think of it each time we move. I prepare, I gather as much of myself as I can, and get ready for the new soil that I will step onto. How will I cultivate myself to grow, knowing that a piece of me will forever remain in that previous soil? A small part of my heart belongs to each place that we have lived, I wouldn't trade it because we have had an amazing life. It also brings with it a kind of sadness that we don't talk about or realize as military spouses.


Some might say, "wow, you get a chance at a fresh start every couple of years". This is probably the best part, the fresh start, I can once again become who ever I want in this new place. No one knows me, my past wins and failures aren't lurking around every corner. This also means finding new schools, dentists, doctors, mechanics, etc. Don't get me wrong you have to embrace it as a clean slate, or it might just all become too much.


There is a beauty and a sadness in having a piece of you left behind. We invest and build in the place we are planted; we may return or we may never set foot in that place again. Would we be the same people without all those pieces scattered between duty stations? It takes a strength that we don't talk about to build and then re-build your life as the military sees fit. Don't get me wrong, we signed up for this, but you can never really know what it will be like until you are two moves in and can barely fathom how many more you may have to do.


The moving season is bittersweet. We are amazing and resilient! The next part of your adventure will take you to places you can't even imagine. Leave the pieces behind and know that you will forever be a part of that soil. It has helped create and prepare you for the next part of your journey in ways you may never fully know.


Conquering Momma,


Charity

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